Series: Male sexual performance anxiety (MSPA) and erectile dysfunction (ED) Article 1 of 3. BODY IMAGE ISSUES

Do you have a poor body image?

Studies have shown that MSPA is one of the most common sexual dysfunctions in the world today, with up to 25% of men affected by the condition. Male sexual performance anxiety is primarily the result of negative thoughts, which are mainly caused by different physical or psychological factors. These include erectile dysfunction, medication side effects, insecurity about being able to please their partners, and a very poor personal body image.

Feeling embarrassed about how you look, often comes into the mix of performance anxiety.  You may have such a lack of self-confidence that it creates an intense fear that you may be unable to perform.

Identifying symptoms of appearance anxiety.

A poor body image is one of the main factors of MSPA. However, in spite of much evidence to the contrary, MSPA has not yet been recognised as an official medical condition, which sometimes results in it being under-diagnosed and under-treated.

Here are some symptoms which can indicate that you may have a negative body image:

·         Do you prefer to have sex in the dark so your partner cannot see your body?

·         Are you wanting to partly cover your body (lights off) with clothing or a bedsheet, so that your partner cannot see the areas which are concerning to you?

·         If your partner happens to show intimate affection, do you often reject the advances for fear that it may lead to sex and a bout of performance anxiety?

·         Are you tormented by thoughts that if you looked better naked, you would be more open to having sex, and certainly enjoy it more than you do?

If you are experiencing any of the above issues before, or even during sex, it will definitely add to your performance anxiety. It will also bring home the fact to you that you have a serious case of a poor body image. Being overly self-conscious and embarrassed about your appearance, can lead to possible erectile dysfunction, depression, and other mental issues which can damage your relationship.

The link between MSPA erectile dysfunction.

Performance anxiety is very common for men with ED, and is the anxiety a man experiences when he feels he is not getting an erection quick enough, or that the erection is not firm enough, and that that it does not seem to last long enough for the entire sexual encounter. Studies have suggested that once a man experiences even a single case of erectile failure, it may always be in the back of his mind, creating a cycle of anxiety if he thinks about sex.

Male Sexual Performance Anxiety and ED are amongst the most common sexual problems, and more often than not, the two go hand in hand. Contributing factors include concerns about a partner’s expectations, fears about your own ability to satisfy these expectations, and low self-esteem due to a poor body image. Many men and their partners often have unrealistic expectations garnered from the TV, where everyone is slim, trim, bronzed and muscular, and sexy.

Comparing themselves to the performances and looks of the TV sex gods, may leave them feeling the body is too fat, too thin, or inadequate, disappointed, and are sexually unattractive. Instead of enjoying the moment, they are focussing on might go wrong, and leaving the partner unsatisfied.

The difference between physical and psychological reasons for erectile dysfunction.

Psychological, or emotional reasons, for ED can include some of the following:

·         Definitely MSPA, as they are often linked in a continuous cycle of fear.

·         Feeling as if there has been a loss of manhood.

·         Low self-esteem, or feeling ashamed.

·         Afraid of intimacy and sex.

ED can have a detrimental effect on him and his partner’s relationship, as well life in general. Sometimes anger and frustration may even filter down and affect others around them.

Physical reasons for ED, are usually linked to medical reasons, which may or may not, have been diagnosed. If you are unduly concerned about ED which does not go away, visit the doctor for a thorough examination.

Here are some factors which are associated with physical issues and erectile dysfunction.

·         Blood vessel disorders, which may also affect the blood flow to the genital areas. These disorders may emanate from clogged arteries around the heart, which reduce the flow of blood to the body, including the penile arteries which need a strong flow for an erection.

·         Stroke or nerve damage from high blood pressure and diabetes.

·         Low testosterone levels.

·         Prostate cancer, colon cancer, or bladder surgeries.

·         Heavy smoking, and alcohol abuse.

·         Side effects from medications for anxiety and stress also play a major role in ED issues.

It is important to visit the doctor if you have ED or another sexual dysfunction. The doctor will ask you pertinent questions, do a general physical examination, including your genitals, to see if there any lumps or swellings.  The answers to the questions and examination results, will be able to establish whether your ED is physical, or psychological.

Most physical issues can fortunately be successfully treated, and depending on the actual diagnosis, the doctor will decide which will be the best treatment option to follow. Psychological problems may result in the doctor also referring you to a psychotherapist for treatment, as the physical symptoms for ED and MSPA, often overlap with some mental issues.

MSPA symptoms which can affect some physical issues.

Performance anxiety affects men in different ways. Apart from a poor body image perception and ED, MSPA can lead to problems such as:

·         Premature ejaculation, when a man hurries so that his climax does not fail.

·         Delayed ejaculation, or if it is blocked by fearful thoughts.

·         A complete lack of sexual desire to avoid intimacy and sex, that may cause him to be embarrassed if it fails.

Unless men discuss these concerns and issues with their partners, the relationship could be damaged beyond repair. However, if a man is currently in a relationship, he may avoid any affection, and tend to withdraw emotionally. It is common for a couple not to be able to communicate about sexual issues, especially if they have never had to do so in the past.  

The inability to communicate can aggravate performance anxiety and increase the anxiety around erectile dysfunction.

An alternative treatment.

There are many ways you can manage performance anxiety, improve your body image, and reduce the ED issues. Research has indicated that if MSPA is causing ED difficulties treating the performance anxiety first, can help to alleviate ED problems.

Experts agree that guided imagery, which is a relaxation technique which involves hypnotherapy, is an excellent, non-invasive way, to relieve stress and anxiety. Hypnotherapy is able to access the subconscious mind and eliminate negative thoughts about your body image, as well as bad memories which contribute to MSPA.

Here are some ways hypnotherapy can help to restore your sexual confidence:

·         Neuro-linguistic Programming (NLP talk therapy) to manage stress, depression, and low self-esteem – which may be holding you back.

·         Create a new, positive mindset, and focus on staying in the moment without worrying about what may or may not happen during a sexual encounter

·         Help you to remove stressful factors from your life.

·         Give you a new perspective of your body image, and help you to recognise areas which can be improved such as overweight etc, by adopting a healthy lifestyle and regular exercise.

Restoring your all-round self-confidence which will give you the courage to discuss these personal sexual concerns with your partner, which may be the key to opening a permanent line of communication with each other. The spill-over can also to help to repair any damage to your relationship.

Outlook.

Male Sexual Performance Anxiety is a normal, fairly common, type of sexual dysfunction which is very treatable. Studies have shown that hypnotherapy and NLP is a highly recommended, and very effective, means of dealing with performance anxiety. Reports have stated that a general anxiety syndrome can also benefit from the treatment.

If you also have ED which has no medical underlying reason, the same outlook and treatment will apply. This is because the MSPA is more than likely be a major factor in the ED issues. As the MSPA improves, so will the erectile function.

For more information about the hypnotherapy and NLP techniques, contact Matthew at Matthew Tweedie Hypnosis.au.org.